A Ray of Sunshine: My Corner

Hello Everyone,

I’m sorry for going silent for a couple of days.

I have been going through a tough patch in my personal life, almost a crisis, since some time now. I was hoping for the light to see the day but it didn’t. And the hardships continued. Sometimes, the struggle continues for long…

I was trying my best and I was holding up to be strong for a long time but there is an end to everything and there comes a time when you are not sure if you are still strong or you have become so immune that problems have stopped affecting you. You start responding to the surroundings with a crocodile hide on your back but that is just a coping mechanism – ignoring issues and assuming that they have disappeared. When in reality they are still there. To catch you unawares at the slightest of a dull moment.

I’m not sure if I am making any sense. But last few days were such days and so I stopped interacting much for the fear of spilling over any gloom to people around me. I didn’t want to trouble anyone. So, I didn’t talk unless someone needed me. I needed some time to cope up before I start posting again.

We take some time but we sure get past every difficult thing troubling us!!
I look back and feel grateful for the little rays of sunshine in my life – My family…  my two lovely kids who look at me with a hopeful smile and make me feel like I need nothing else in life… my parents, with whom I can talk about anything and everything in life… my profession, where I get to meet people who need me and when I talk to them, I feel a sense of purpose and achievement… and exactly the same I feel, when I write something and talk to all of you.

So these are my coping mechanisms
~ When the situation is still controllable, I pretend that everything is fine and keep struggling to correct them… and I keep writing…
~ When I feel strong no more, I become silent, withdraw myself from everyone and even from people who love me… it happens for a few days… then my family overwhelms me with love… I rebound back and I go back to writing…
~ When things are not in my hand, I write extensively as that keeps me sane and helps me deal with my tough times.

My kids and my parents are my rays of sunshine. Writing is my solace on a deeper level.

One more thing about my online presence
1. Whenever I am absent for a 1-2 days only – Assume that I am busy 🙂
2. If I am absent for a few days or present here and there but not interacting much – Assume that either I am sick or going through a difficult phase. Wait for some time. I recover on my own and get back on my feet.
3. If I am absent for more than one month – Then, I am definitely dead 😀

I am dealing with my issues. Please don’t ask about it as it is painful to discuss and share. What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. You fall, you struggle, you get up and get going all over again, till you fall again – This is life!!

And no one is exempted from this pain. All of us have to go through this!

Love you all

Take care. Stay blessed.

PS:

~ Tell me in the comments – about everything that keeps you going during a crisis. Everything that helps you deal with stress i.e. Your coping mechanisms… Your rays of sunshine during a tough patch!

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~ I will start updating regularly from tomorrow 🙂

……………….. 

 

 

 

 

81 Comments Add yours

  1. Aastha Sondarva says:

    Hey di! I am so sorry for whatever you are going through! You don’t deserve so much pain and so much difficulties!!! You are the most amazing person I have ever come across!! I hope you are better now and sending all the warmth and good vibes and wishes and prayers for you!! Everything does get better with time. That’s what I have known and also heard. Sooner or later. Just that there are some pains and problems we can talk about others not so much. Also I believe whatever happens happens for a reason and it is written in our fate to happen something. But I am sure you are very very strong and will come out of the situation even stronger!!!
    My coping mechanism includes sleeping because even though it is not that good I can escape the reality for sometime escape the problems and when I wake up I am at a more stable state than before and able to think about it more clearly! But them off course there are some problems which don’t even let you sleep so I just lay on my bed thinking and listening to some songs. Sometimes I talk to a friend because the advices and philosophy😅😂 given does help and makes my mood lighter and changes my perspective at looking at things.

    I hope whatever it is passed soon and you feel much better.
    Sorry for replying this late and extremely sorry for not knowing what to speak!
    Sending goodest energy to you!!!

    1. Manita V says:

      Don’t say sorry dear! I know that you and your wishes are always with me.
      It means so much that you all are there for me, with me whenever I have felt low.
      Lots of love
      Stay blessed

  2. Anonymous says:

    Dii when will you update ?

  3. Priya says:

    I guessed so…Something was telling me…A deeper connect…Rest i am dm ing you di ..Please respond…I am shattered to hear these..

    1. manitavb says:

      I know I haven’t been able to talk to you for long. Thank you for being so patient and understanding…

  4. lovepeehu says:

    Diiii 11:11…and I wish you get worlds happiness. I am sorry I couldn’t understand that you were going through though phase. I can give you my lots of love and wishes only 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘 you know right that I am there for you always. If you think that you can share your personal thing then please share with me …it will make me fell worthy. I want to be there for you always in your Happy times as well as though times please.

    My coping mechanism is first I try to make me understand that yes I can solve this problem or I can handle this.
    2) if first one doesn’t work then I find happiness in my parents and siblings happiness and think about them.
    3)when it becomes worst and I can’t handle anymore then I talk with my mom if I feel comfortable to share with her and she makes everything good for me in no time.

    And last but not least as you know this very well when nothing works ..I know coming to you with my problem always works. From last 3 to 4 months I feel like to share my every problem with you and my friend pooja. But sometimes somethings and you know what are all these things, I only share with you and I feel so light so light that I can’t tell you. Thank-you always❤️

    Seriously please Di make me feel little bit Worthy by sharing your problems with me if possible. I know, I can’t solve them but at least I can listen you and try my best to do something if I could do. Lots of love always ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ and sorry for not understanding that you were going through rough phase in your personal life.

    1. manitavb says:

      Please do not apologise… how would you know about something that I didn’t share with you.
      I know that you are always there and that makes me feel blessed.
      I will share everything… just give me some time…

      Love you a lot …

  5. Shahenaaz says:

    U say that u will spill which u don’t what….. Though IAM younger than u…not that mature as u. Still I want to say…..share Ur problems.
    When we share our problems, it will reduce the burden.
    And when we use our words abt our pain…..our mind focus on every detail what we are saying….and it will give answers for whatever Ur going through. Even if it’s phase…it will show u path.
    Try once that’s my secret to get through my problems.
    U want us to share our problems…to reduce our pain. Same time Ur also that special to me…IAM always there if u want to share…Iam there…jus remember this.

    1. manitavb says:

      It means a lot when people are there to share your burden and pain.
      Thanks for this assurance.
      I will talk to you once I get the hang of things.
      God bless you dear

  6. Dhruvi says:

    Hi Manita Di,
    I hope you are feeling better now.I personally believe that not giving up is the biggest strength while dealing with problems.I would just say that keep doing the things you love and spend time with your loved ones as their presence can also make you feel better.For me reading (currently your stories!!) and music are my stressbusters.Sometimes detaching yourselves from the outer world is what we need.
    Be strong and fight back.
    (P.S. You might not know me as I have been your silent reader but felt like commenting today.)
    Take care,di.

    1. manitavb says:

      Thanks for writing to me Dhruvi. You have no idea what this support means to me. It has given me a new energy to keep going…
      Stay blessed.. lots of love to you

  7. Ann Aysh says:

    Its ok to feel not ok some times.. When we come back we become more strong…

  8. Ann Aysh says:

    Hey my dear i can feel what u r feeling now.. I have experienced it many times.. U know right i come to u whenever i feel low. And some times we cant share our pain.. It goes to extreme level.. At tat time i search any of my oldest friends whom i dint contact frm many days.. When i cal dem they make me remember our old beautifull memories.. Or else i read any of my favourite fan fiction or novel… We become insane when stress level passes extreme level of our patience..

    1. manitavb says:

      You are right. Shedding the pain by talking is therapeutic and I do that.
      Thank you.
      Take care. Lots of love…

  9. Shruti says:

    First of all you have kids and job then too you are following your passion is just wow, I mean you are a superwoman period🙌. Secondly, as I already said you are a superwoman so it’s obvious you will overcome the hiccup you are facing right now like a pro😎. And lastly, if you ask my coping mechanisms there are few, I blabber everything to my parents and good for nothing brother ( he is really good for nothing because he always tries to prove how it was my fault, I don’t know why I even talk to him🤦‍♀), after that Netflix is a savior. I am not proud of it but I think I do act like a bitch with my friends when I am upset but they still haven’t abandoned me which means I have good friends I guess and I love them. I may come out to be a bit shallow to you but I can’t help it’s a manufacturing defect 😅.

    1. manitavb says:

      Anybody who can talk deeply about her emotions and what makes her feel better is not shallow. Love you for being upfront. You have good friends… it says a lot about you!

      Thanks for writing to me. I am no superwoman. Just an ordinary woman trying to juggle her life to fit in this universe.
      I’m sure I will overcome this too.

  10. Pavani says:

    I didn’t liked the way you asked us to assume something(I won’t mention that) if you are inactive for a month.you are going to have a really long happy and peaceful life.you will write stories and we will read them till you and we all become old which is not happening anytime soon.😍😘 Love you so much.

    1. manitavb says:

      I won’t say that again.
      I will definitely write for a hundred years more or maybe till all of us become old 🙂

      1. Pavani says:

        👍 😍

  11. Pavani says:

    I am seriously don’t know what to say,my family is my strength but sometimes I don’t feel like sharing my problems with anyone, I prefer dealing them alone,but still there is some sort of uneasiness and stress .music ,stories and sleep are always my stress Buster’s.You are a very strong women di i know you will be out of all your problems and back to your normal self.stay happy di😃.

    1. manitavb says:

      Same here. I deal with my issues alone and only once I know that I have passed that threshold of vulnerability, I come out and discuss it. I’m glad I discussed it here.

  12. Rosann2015 says:

    Dear My Strong Rock Manita Di,

    First i wana give u a tight hug and kiss to you. I understand how ur feeling di because i too had the same phase,but these problems u can face it / a get solution / and solve step at a time.. this is what i do when i face much bigger mountain. U are my inspiration my mentor solution queen. Everything is possible with a solution. When i feel down i sleep or do some arranging watch comedy motivation vidoes.. bring myself back and think a solution…coz with a messed up mind nothing will work.. Your second copying mechanizm applies to me also.. but that will only for a day.So hope u find a solution to ur problems even if its a mountain and i know things will get better and u will come out of darkness. and Di check your wattpad pc msg.

    1. manitavb says:

      Thank you for all the lovely words dear. It means a lot to me.
      As for wattpad, I’ve replied you there and asked a question. Let me know how you are going to proceed.

  13. Sarmista says:

    First of all a tight hug to u from all of us. Along with ur family n frnds we a also there with u to stand with u in every struggle of ur life.Never ever feel that u r alone in all this..We will be there alwys..Talk with us whenever u want.I know life became so tough sometimes that it almost become impossible to deal with everything. I have been to this situation before still struggling to cope up with it..
    My coping mechanism is to distract myself from the things which hurts me.. And if the problem is big then I prefer to talk with my parents to take some suggestions from them. There were times when even my parents were not there to help me out. That time I faced everything alone n stood strong to face everything. That time I did wht makes me happy without thinking much about others.. Its very important to make urself happy first without thinking much about others..

    1. manitavb says:

      Thank you Sarmista.
      Tight hug to you too.
      Thanks for saying that you are there with me. I feel so warm and secured with that.

      You are right. I have realised too, that doing what makes you happy first is an important step in healing.

  14. maniknandini1 says:

    First I will say thank you Di. ❤ I am going through the same and still struggling to be normal. But your this note will surely help me to overcome everything. A tight hug to you for this. 🤗 Sometimes when we listen others problems we forgot our own ones. And we got that strength to be strong and face then again like a pillar. I am trying to reach you from last two days and troubling you I am sorry for that. I will pray to Bappa that he will give you strength and will show you light. Cause I believe in praying and my ma always says ” Ache logo ke sath hamesha acha hi hota he” And you are like Angel to all of us ..you are always their for us… Everything will be fine.
    I always share everything with my mummy whenever I stuck in situation like this and just hug her. Her warmth give me an unknown strength always. I just keep my head on her lap and sleep. But here I am away from her and couldn’t get it. So I share it with her. But this time I just don’t feel to share it with her she just get worried. So I share it with the one who are close to me. Cause when that person consoles me out of 10 things at least 3-4 go straight to my brain and I get that kick to deal with it. Another thing I do is I cry alone. I cry until my tears won’t stop. And I write my diary. I write everything I feel. It make be revealed.
    I hope you will over come from this soon. Stay blessed. 💫

    1. manitavb says:

      I know you were trying to contact me and I’m sorry I said that I will talk later as I was not in the right frame of mind at that time.
      Discussing with mom is the best thing you can do. Even I do that unless I know that she will get worried about me.
      Crying is not optional. We can neither initiate tears nor stop them. They are such crazy friends 🙂

      1. maniknandini1 says:

        I know Di PLEASE no need to say sorry. I can understand. And I hope everything will be awesome soon.
        You know you just helped me unknowingly. Here I am reading all the comments of all the readers of yours. And you know what I get. I am getting positivity from every comment. And that hope which shout out loud that everything will be fine. I was in need of this and you just helped me Di.
        I first cried. Cried hard but when I realise I won’t get anything doing that then I searched about things which will give me peace and strength. And here I am again standing to face all the problems which will be thrown on my face.
        I want to say a thank you to you and to all those who has put their share of feelings here. 🙏 which only reflects positivity.
        Once again thank you. 💫

  15. chandrasan says:

    My coping mechanism is reading ur stories any time and ur positive messages, ❤❤ ur writing has the power to divert us from outside world😍😍

    1. manitavb says:

      So sweet of you <3

  16. chandrasan says:

    I understand ur feelings di, it happens even I will go all silent and away from ppl if am stressed. All I want to say is this phase will pass and u will come out more stronger ❤ I wish and pray to go to give more strength and love to deal with this situation. Just know that We love u and we are there for U ❣

    1. manitavb says:

      Thank you for praying for my strength.
      I promise I will emerge stronger and win this phase … lots of love…

  17. Elina says:

    Hardships and some events are necessary to test us. They make us stronger like never before. If life gives you 10 reasons sad hone k liye then think of 10,000 reasons which makes you happy.. you should smile as it will lessen your worries, your problems will become tiny- chotu sa. One more thing, It is God’s plan, we humans can never understand his plan but with time slowly slowly we are growing, getting stronger. For every situation we go through there is a motive behind it. This is not the right time to understand anything but with time you’ll understand the fruits of this phase. And about my mantra, there’s no specific mantra. You know yourself better than anyone else. All I wanna say is Smile because there are so many people waiting to see your precious smile.

    1. manitavb says:

      Dear Elina,
      Thank you so much for the deep words.
      We cannot understand God’s plans but they are certainly better than ours.
      Lots of love to you.

  18. Anshdha Rathore says:

    Waise u r a doc urself so wat more can I tell you… But yes, I’ve had my roughest and toughest times a year ago… That was probably the lowest I felt all my life. It just feels as if there’s noone and nothing out there that can get u out. All doors seem shut. Although I’m a very positive and optimistic person by nature, but yes too much negativity without even a slightest hope of things getting right in ur life does take a toll on u after a while. Wat helped me the most during that time was meditation… And reading “the secret law of attraction”. Yes, it might seem philosophical but yes, both of these things do work. They worked for me. Reading the law of attraction made me believe and gave me the hope that life can get back normal again. And meditation gave me the strength and courage to face the tough times, as well as the clarity of mind to help figure out wat would be the right decision for me. Of course they worked also because my optimism hadn’t yet left me… There was a tiny bit of hope in my heart left, which said everything will get just fine. And, once I get out of this, since this was my lowest, now I’ll only get uphill from here. No more lows. Just highs. That’s how life works right?
    Anyways, I would recommend u to try both the things out. There are other coping mechanisms that I use on a regular basis, but they’re not that effective. Bcoz I run from problems or close my eyes whenever they bug me more. Which is wrong. But whenever things get out of hand, I again resort to those two things. Hope that helps. Do try that once! I’m sure you’ll feel the difference and positivity.

    Your loyal reader!

    1. manitavb says:

      You are right. Like a lot of people wrote that when you are at your lowest then there is only one way left – the way uphill…

      I have read ‘The Secret’ and I realized that in a way, that has been the way of my life. Positivity and optimism take you a long way in life. It actually helped me cope up till now.
      I am now going to try Meditation, as that is one thing I keep recommending to my patients and everyone else, but unable to do myself.
      Thank you.

  19. pixiepari says:

    i am not gonna ask you what happened but dare you talk about death…the blessings you are unknowingly gaining from all of us will make you live for atleast 200 years…you just wait and watch…and our di is so strong that no external factors can ever affect her or make her weak….jab bhi main kisi arab country ke bare mein padhti hoon ya dekhti hoon manasvi is the only one who comes in my mind that’s your magic di….stay blessed and stay strong…you will rise more strongly everytime…i know that about you…

    aap sabko reply deti ho except me ??? **sad pout**

    1. manitavb says:

      Awww… So, I’ll start replying today, starting from you…
      A big heart to you!!!
      I know that a lot of people become upset that I don’t reply to them. Actually, I want to reply to all, but not able to keep up and then I start writing next update …

      Thank you for all the lovely wishes and all the comments you have made without fail on all my updates.
      I might not be able to reply but I do read every comment and message and feel blessed. I remember how regularly you have posted for every update of mine and that means so much to me, you have no idea 🙂

      Lots of love to you…

  20. rajirath says:

    I have been in situations before- few of them. It took a lot of mental strength to recover and rebound . Sometimes its difficult to share with the loved ones, thats when I resort to someone special ( friends or well wishers) to listen and give some honest advice .
    In some situations silence is the best therapy while in others talking about it with the concerned (who is important in your life) and sorting out matters is essential.
    I have been a reserved person majority of my life but I found out that openly discussing what’s bothering your mind helps! Also there is a solution to every problem when u think/work hard.
    I am positive that we will handle anything when our mind is not cloudy. Take to yoga or walking to calm the nerves. I am sure this phase will pass Manita. Hang in there.

    1. manitavb says:

      Thank you for the positivity sent for me. Yes, I will hang on … for as long as it takes… I know I have people who have my back…
      lots of love to you for writing to me

  21. Anonymous says:

    ❤️❤️❤️ i hope u recover very soon.. take care

    1. manitavb says:

      Thank you soooo much. Lots of love to you!

  22. Apurva says:

    He Dr. I know it’s easy to say to others let it go, don’t be bothered etc but it is difficult to follow. Give yourself time. It’s ok if it is taking time. I always keep on asking to my mom u do so many religious good deeds but still there were or are certain things in her life that I tend to ask why us? That time she tells me god is giving me the strength to overcome these issue by making me tough. Also I just tike to share something..by better half is supportive me being working and dedicated employee but as per his convenience. I was extremely unhappy after my 2nd child that even after performing the best in team I got an average rating. That time my father told me we why so disappointed? U hv 2 increments and 2 bonus at home. And I realised that yes sometimes the solution is so simple but we overthink by comparing us with surroundings. I have got many good things in life which are like dream for others. Now my mantra is you can’t get everything in life so make the best what you have in your hand….just remember apart from your family, friends u hv a fan in Mumbai who is always thinking about your well-being and praying for you…lots of 🤗🤗🤗🤗 and 💟💟💟💟.

    1. manitavb says:

      Loved the way you shared about yourself, Apurva. It means a lot to me.
      Your dad is right. We can’t get everything in life and there is no point in whining about something over which we have no control…

      And please don’t call yourself my fan… I write here to talk to my friends and all of you have become an integral part of my life now.
      love and best wishes.

  23. Unnati says:

    Thank you so much I m desperately waiting yr update

    1. manitavb says:

      I will update tonight, hopefully…

  24. ekta Semwal says:

    Hi doc.. I can never understand the depth of your pani but I just want to say I am with you.. Consider me your extended family 😊.. You are among those few people who I don’t know personally but I admire and respect alot.. The way you manage things around you with your words is commendable.. Just keep going for your loved ones .. You Know it’s worth it.. you had asked what keep me way from stress and my coping mechanism ??? Well it’s music since my childhood and now a days your stories are also a part of it.. Seeing your update makes me happy .. So you and music are my happy Maker 😊😘..

    1. manitavb says:

      I already consider you as a part of my extended family, Ekta. I promise that I will keep going and will stop only at a point where I know that I have defeated all the demons.
      Love you for considering me and my stories as a part of your happy maker list 🙂
      Stay blessed.

  25. Amby says:

    More strength, love and hugs to you ❤️

    1. manitavb says:

      To you too dear… love and hugs…
      thanks for the wishes…

  26. Sree says:

    I belive when u feel this is it I can not take it anymore, it is almost the end of it, cause either u already know by then what needs to done or you understand it is not in ur hands, with lugging my life for 42 years I have had that realization , and if ur life is like extremes like mine, I get a chance at things in life only once if I can not relish it for the moment I might not get it back at all , my fathered adored me like crazy , I got a husband to keeps saying let’s divorce everytime there is a issue and I just got numb to it as I just care for my daughter’s life now. I am just happy I got the love and affection for 25 years on my life and I am blessed.

    1. manitavb says:

      More power to you and everyone else who deals with life thinking about people they love and fight with circumstances keeping a smile on their faces.
      My wishes for you!

  27. Tendon219 says:

    I know not whether to call it a ‘coping mechanism’, but I ‘think’ and ‘hope’. I ‘think’ about the people who have got it far worse than me, yet somehow pull through and manage. I ‘think’ of all the blessings I have compared to many, in the form of a roof over my head, a warm and filling food on the table and irreplacably amazing people including my parents, friends and family. And then I ‘hope’. I ‘hope’ for a better tomorrow. With that ‘hope’ I find the motivation to push through a little more and a little more, and a little more. Also, for All the folks going through things right now, tough times don’t last, tough people do and I believe in you. You will come through this stronger and better.

    1. manitavb says:

      Loved each and every word you wrote.
      Hope and gratitude take us a long way…
      Problems and their magnitude may be different and so are our strengths to deal with them and the coping mechanisms …
      but my dad says that God never gives you problems you won’t be able to face and when he has decided for you to go through it, then you got to face it whether you like it or not… so face it with a smile… 😊😊

      1. Tendon219 says:

        🤗 🤗 🤗 and more 🤗

  28. Anonymous says:

    Sleep is my best escape and coping mechanism🙈

    1. manitavb says:

      Haha… I usually sleep 5-6 hours a day but yesterday, I shut all phones, clinic, every sound and slept 11 hours straight… really felt better…

  29. Anonymous says:

    Hey doc
    Look.aroumd.you.you have two beautiful kids and wonderful parents.What more do you want in life as a ray of light. don’t judge yourself
    to harshly.it seems your parents are your biggest support, talk to them.always have an open communication with them.it will help.but the most important thing is to learn to ignore unwanted opinions.its really important to block not just negative thoughts but also negativity.Ignore things like a pro and give importance only to things that matters the most.i am not saying to be strong, don’t cry…etc.its okay to cry,it’s okay to fall weak,it’s okay to be sad, disappointed….it’s okay to feel angry,..but look around you and you will see the love of your life i.e your kids,your parents.i have seen the worst in my family but I have also seen them learning to be strong and moving on in life.i would.really like.to help you.i may not be a counselor but life has taught me well.i might have a different perspective to your crisis.
    Always remember,iam there for you.i might not know you personally but I am sure I can be a part of your ray of light.

    1. manitavb says:

      That is so sweet of you to say so. I will definitely ask help next time. ( do write your name so that I know)

      But the fact is that I was able to come out and write about it, means I’ve crossed the initial hurdles and already coping up…
      But thanks again.

      I do ignore negativity but sometimes there are unavoidable circumstances and we do fall prey to them.
      Thanks for writing to me …

      1. Latha Lakshmisha says:

        i am latha.remember,I told u once that I don’t comment always but would like u to continue your writing.I know that you have crossed your initial hurdles,but still you need the will to be strong.According to me being strong means being happy and content in life.Life is not just uncertain but also unpredictable.give some time,surround yourself with people who not only loves you but also understand you.i know it’s difficult to ignore the happenings around you,but try and do it.not just for yourself but for your kids.keep the outlook positive.You will be alright with time.
        Also,you are not talking to a young adult.I am woman who is in early Forties,and as I said life has taught me well.Whenever you feel low, please don’t hesitate to contact me.
        Lots of love doc,keep trying,don’t ever give up and things will fall in place.

        1. manitavb says:

          Thanks Latha.
          I am glad I wrote about it here. It’s beautiful to receive support from all sides and to know that there are people whom I can turn to…

          Thank you for writing to me and offering a shoulder. I will always remember.

  30. shygal9 says:

    I miss your reading your stories Di..
    Whenever I feel low or anxiety I read your stories to distract myself old old chapters of tangel and ties whichever is available on this website..And my mother always says that whenever you fell like that just do one thing pray to God and tell him everything and say that Now I leave everything up to you…You have to help me…Just have faith on god di everything is gonna be okay..I know am no one to tell you..You know much more than me and have seen the world more than me☺.
    P.S: missing your updates di.. Update soon please..I know am being ridiculous asking for update in this situation sorryyyy 😅

    1. manitavb says:

      Please don’t say that you are no one to tell me that. Each and every person here is close to my heart.

      Leaving things to God is all that we can do… and should do…

      He knows the best. Thank you for writing

  31. Rupashi says:

    My coping mechanism depends on my mood. Sometimes I just like listening to peppy songs and dance on them in my room or I’ll start watching some comedy or light hearted show or movie. Sometimes I start re-reading stories/books which I personally love. Sometimes I just take a cold shower with loud music. Sometimes I go outside for a walk all by myself. Sometimes I just talk to my mother or sister or even any of my besties and pour my heart out. And if on rare occasions I am very gloomy I listen to slow sad songs, sing along and cry so that whatever I’m feeling is out from my system. And if any of the above don’t make me go back to normal then it means I need a break so I go into my own shell where I kind of self introspect and not really talk to anyone for like one or two days and mostly just sleep.

    1. manitavb says:

      Thank you for writing Rupashi.
      It’s so important to know what will make you feel better in a certain situation. I’m glad you know that.
      Things may or may not get better, problems may or may not solve but we should know how to keep smiling and staying positive!!

  32. rmlatha says:

    May God bless you with abundance of strength, dear.

    I keep reminding myself Ramana maharshi’s quotes and all the quotes out there on life … and when i was going through worst nightmare of my life, mom passed away. Then i felt kind of void in my heart.. i keep reminding myself that …

    1. manitavb says:

      My heart goes out to you. Mothers are the closest to us.
      I have no idea what to say… Losing them is the worst nightmare and I’m so proud that you are holding up strongly.

      May God bless you with all the strength…

  33. Pooja says:

    First of sending lots of love , hugs and positive vibes to u.. 💕 I really wish and pray that whatever is troubling u gets soughted and u r back to ur happy self.. 😘❤️

    “ If I am absent for more than one month – Then, I am definitely dead “… please don say this even as a joke .. u mean a lot to us.. it’s like we are all a family connected in some or the other way .. so such words hurts ☹️💔

    Coming to my way of dealing problems to be very frank i think it’s easier said than done.. I do have few ppl whom I always reach out to, to share my problems.. but frankly speaking it’s just makes me feel light but doesn’t solve my problems .. and when I feel that discussing with them wil make them worried, I don discuss too ☹️ most of the cases I just go silent, shut myself and cry it out when alone .. but yes lately it’s my baby that keeps me strong and keeps me going.. and just the realisation that he is around me,makes me feel good..then finally as they say time heals everything and I move on

    1. manitavb says:

      Thanks for the support and lovely words Pooja.
      You are right. All of us are connected and each and everyone who is here with me, means a lot to me.

      And yes, talking doesn’t solves problems just makes you feel lighter.

      I have also noticed that mother and child bond is bestowed with healing qualities. Our mothers heal us and when we become mothers, we find solace in our kids.

      Love you so much…

  34. Lopa says:

    The stories I read keep me going. It distracts me from the real world. In the virtual world life is simple and easy without too much drama and may be a happily ending. The second thing is my mother and sister… They both are pillars of strength to me. They will always be there for me is the truth which keeps me sane in every situation. I will share with everyone today love is not easy nor break ups but you need to fight it out… A constant fight of mind and heart. For a instant I did lost my mind and wanted to end my life. But the moment I remembered my mother.. I got over it. The toughest one decision though where you need to constantly hold yourself. I did it for my self respect and I don’t blame myself for still loving the guy. So life goes on.. No need to worry about irrelevant things.

    1. manitavb says:

      BIg, tight hugs for you Lopa.
      You averted such a dreadful situation for your mom and for your self respect.
      Nothing is more unfortunate than having a young, talented life gone like that…
      I agree, nothing is easy in life and you need to fight through everthing, whether it is career, job, relationships, finances or health…
      I’m so proud of you that you got through it with strong lessons and without permanent damages…
      Life goes on, like you said!!

  35. Salriz says:

    IL hope whatever issues you going true IL go away soon for me my sister n my kids are my hope thy are my stress buster n some time IL shut my self with everyone when you feel like no one will understand you some time talking to an old friend helps…

    1. manitavb says:

      I shut myself when I can’t discuss it even with friends, kids and family… for either you think that people won’t understand or you don’t want to trouble them… parents get worried too…

  36. Anonymous says:

    I can really understand you because i am going through the same but i have learnt from my mom that to never give up and fight till the end…Will pray for you that your problem gets solved soon..take care..be strong❤

    1. manitavb says:

      Exactly the same, my mom tells me.
      Mothers are a blessing to the world…

  37. ~Shiv~ says:

    A tight jaadu ki jhappi to you Manita 🤗🤗

    My coping mechanism is reorganizing or redecorating stuff.. or I binge watch or binge read historicals.. best escape route for me.. distracts me and makes me happy.

    1. manitavb says:

      Jaadu ki jhappi received and sent back …

      Your coping mechanism is worth a try! I’ll tell you how it felt, when I do that next time 🙂

  38. Anonymous says:

    I am straight forward ..If I didn’t like anything ,I will tell it openly and never do it under any circumstances..no matter whoever the person before me is…I am LIKE THAT…I am brought up like that..My close friends say that I am being too rude and harsh on others…But in my perceptive I am not… sometimes I feel bad when they judge me..but slowly I learnt that everyone is different…. their thinking and their perceptive differs ….now it doesn’t bother me that much..

    1. manitavb says:

      Glad to know about that. It is a good thing in life to be straight forward. I am like that too. I call a spade a spade.

      And, thankfully, I am not dealing with stuff like that I am not able to speak up about something. Or like someone is torturing me and making me do things I don’t want to. That day will never come 😀

  39. Nivedita says:

    Hello Manita di,
    I am a regular reader of your stories and your stories are nothing but inspiring and heart warming! While my college restricts me from using my phone, all I do is read your books secretly whenever my mail notifies me about the updates! You must have never seen me commenting but trust me, I love you and your works a lot! ❤☺
    Coming to you, you have tons and tons of people wishing you all the luck and love to cope up with your stress! I wish you come out stronger than ever because I know how strong you are! The bubbly eyes of your daughters will make you fight the world! I wish to see you give us smiles and happy tears again because I know you will be back!! You are an inspiration and just like a mentor!

    Hope to see you come out of the darkness because the sun never fails to set. ❤🌈

    1. manitavb says:

      That was such a heart-warming message Nivedita. It brought tears to my eyes.
      Thank you for that confidence. I promise that I won’t fail all those who love me and wish the best for me.
      I’m blessed to have people like you around… What else do I need 🙂

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